when you are planning to do something, you are taking responsibility. you are maintaining agency in your own life.
the moment someone else says “hey pick up your shit” then it becomes their command and your response to them. No longer do you get told “hey wow you picked up nice!” you get told “why did it take you so long to do what i asked”
Naturally, hearing that enough times creates a pattern of “rebellion” whereupon ANY request to do ANYTHING you’ve been planning to do immediately sours it
OP I think we need to have a talk about your definition of “slightly uncomfortable” because my levels of rage skyrocketed faster than it took Thanos to snap his fingers